I Will Not Leave You As Orphans

When thinking about all we are about to go through in adopting a child, the hardest part I imagine will be leaving our child after the first week-long visit (at which point we will head home to wait for the adoption to be finalized before we can return for her). In re-reading Russell Moore's book Adopted for Life, this part in particular was so heartbreaking.

"When Maria and I first walked into the orphanage, where we were led to the boys the Russian courts had picked out for us to adopt, we almost vomited in reaction to the stench and squalor of the place. The boys were in cribs, in the dark, lying in their own waste.

Leaving them at the end of each day was painful, but leaving them the final day, before going home to wait for the paperwork to go through, was the hardest thing either of us had ever done. Walking out the room to prepare for the plane ride home, Maria and I could hear Maxim calling out for us and falling down in his crib, convulsing in tears. Maria shook with tears of her own. I turned around to walk back into their room, just for a minute.

I placed my hand on both of their heads and said, knowing they couldn't understand a word of English, 'I will not leave you as orphans; I will come to you.'"

I pray that our child will not be in such squalor, though regardless I know this will be painful. I already cry imagining this moment. But I suppose the alternative is not seeing her at all until we are there to bring her home (not that that is actually an option for us, but for a different country perhaps). So, I am thankful that we will have this extra time with her. And, to be that close to having her with us will be so amazing!

We can't wait to meet you sweetheart!