Ten Things About You - 17 Months

1. When you want something, you point at it and shake your head 'yes'
2. You can blow your nose
3. You can hold a crayon or pencil with a perfect grip in both your right and left hand! We are guessing you were taught this (perhaps in preparation for using chop sticks?), because you are very thoughtful and intentional about it!
4. You usually wake up smiling
5. You are all about slapstick comedy! Nothing gets you giggling quicker than someone getting hit in the head or your brother falling down!
6. You know three signs ('more', 'please', and 'all done')
7. You have six spoken words, all of which are new words for you since we met you 1 month ago... In this order your first words were... 'xie xie' (thank you), 'shoes', 'please', 'baby', and 'bye bye', and 'guh guh' (brother). She's adding about 1 new word per week. For this Momma of two slow-to-talk boys, this is pretty amazing!
8. You hate having your clothes changed... but love being dressed and accessorized!
9. You have two Mongolian spots (a common Asian birthmark) on your little body
10. You love pretending to eat and drink, and can pretend to pour pretend tea pretty well for a baby who is not yet 18 months old! I see lots of tea parties in our future!

Strickers Grove

Last night was so amazing... we joined our church family down at a local amusement park called Strickers Grove. We rode rides (Canaan rode his first real rollercoaster and LOVED it), ate way too many snow cones and ice cream, and had a blast!

We were once again amazed at Lainey and how well she's adjusting. We closed the place down... and soaked up every minute with great friends and sweet moments with the boys and Lainey.

As the park was about to close, I carried Lainey over to the carosuel and were able to ride it together, just the two of us. As I held her with the happy bandstand music playing, she smiled and pointed to all she was taking in. As I watched her, I noticed once again the small scar on her arm... the one she has because she repeatedly scratched that same spot over and over in her orphanage (a nervous behaviour, or possibly simply from boredom). And I was reminded once again how far she's come in such a short time. Her world is so vastly different from what it was just a month ago.

Indianapolis Childrens Museum

On Monday we drove to Indianapolis to meet my parents (or, more importantly, so they could meet Lainey!) at the Children's Museum. The Indy Children's Museum is one (if not THE) best in the country, and we are so fortunate to have such a cool place so close to us. I have so many sweet memories from my childhood from there, and now it's so amazing to take our three babies.

Last month the children's museum opened a new exhibit, in honor of Lainey's homecoming (we like to say), all about CHINA! They have some of the REAL terracotta warriors on display, and an awesome area to experience life in China. The timing of this could not be more perfect, especially for Canaan. It was so awesome to take him there and show him a little taste of the place he's been learning so much about as we prepared to bring Lainey home.

It was so sweet also to see Lainey a little in her element. At one point, she started using chop sticks and a bowl (at the Chinese restaurant, where Ezra and Canaan were cooking and serving) and slurped up imaginary noodles, which I'm sure she's seen done in China so many times before.

The One About Sleep

Since Lainey's been home, we've been AMAZED at how awesome she's doing. Even after a short time home, she feels almost like any other child - laughing, being silly, learning, being adventurous... There are certain 'orphanage behaviors' we learned about when preparing for Lainey - thing like hoarding food (the effect of a child who was either frequently deprived of food, or had no control over the amount or frequency of meals), attachment struggles, etc. Because Lainey came from a better orphanage, we haven't seen many of the typical things we were expecting to work through.

But, we have struggled with sleep. I've written about our sleep struggles a lot actually... usually after a good night where I think we've finally got it all figured out. But then as I'm about to post in victory... we have another long night.  We're hoping some of this might just still be jet lag, but we know the environment with us is just SO different from what she's used to she is going to need time to adjust.

We know now not to even try naptime. Lainey wants to nap on her own terms, and so we let her put herself to sleep (and she does... thumb in her mouth and curled up on a floor pillow usually). The social worker agreed that this is probably the best way to go about it, so she can feel in control a bit.

We've also figured out that getting her to bed at a normal bedtime (8pm) is just not going to happen right now. It's a LONG (1+ hour) tough battle to get her to sleep that early, and when she finally does fall asleep, it doesn't seem to last long. So, she's been up for a few nights now until after 10pm.

Even though Lainey is 17 months old now, we are still working to solidify our bond with her and reinforce that she can trust us. Part of this is not letting her cry it out alone in her room. She also JUST wants Momma at night, and so I'm spending a lot of time with her in her crib or on the floor of her room. She alternates in those two spots... she's either in her crib or with me on the floor. There are times when she's sleeping so well in her crib (usually that first stretch) that I can sleep a bit back in BJ and I's room (which my back very much appreciates). Then sometime during the night she wakes up crying, and so I head back and usually sleep on the floor with her from that point on.

(Last night... after a good 4 hour stretch, she woke up screaming. I opened her door... and realized why. Somehow the DOG (that she's still scared of a lot of the time) ended up SHUT in her room with her. Eeek!)

Every few nights something magical happens and she sleeps straight through! We know soon enough that should be happening more and more. Until then, we're living a bit like we have a newborn in the house! :)

And sometimes... a very overtired little girl!

First Swim

(Sooo... I'm blogging a little of order... but I'll back up later to write about our trip to Indy to meet Grandma Sue & Papa John, and how Lainey's sleeping.)

After running some errands today, we made a failed attempt to visit the splash park with the kids (it was closed). Aunt Maryann saved the day and we ended up going to her place to SWIM! First up... naptime in the grass...


We were wondering how she might do with this, but she instantly LOVED it! Not one cry, just a whole lot of smiles from our baby girl!


I can hardly believe we're a family of FIVE with two toddlers and a preschooler!

International Adoption Clinic Visit

Today was a big day for Miss Lainey. After another long night with her on the bare nursery floor (sleep is an issue we're still working on), we made our way to Cincinnati Children's Hospital. We are so fortunate that we have one of the best International Adoption Clinics in the country so close to us. The IACs are so great in how they holistically approach the treatment of adopted children, understanding that the expectations for a child adopted internationally have to be shifted to take into consideration the fact that they might be malnourished and/or not given a chance to fully thrive before being adopted.

We had a long, productive day meeting with a wide range of doctors and therapists. Thankfully, the general assessment is that Lainey is quite healthy and developmentally on target! Pretty remarkable considering she's spent her life in an orphanage until just a few weeks ago. She even said another new word there, "baby", as she fed the toy baby doll for the occupational therapist.

We also knew that she was tall, and found out that she is in the 89th percentile in height, and that's not even on the Asian girls growth chart (I'm sure she's off that chart). 

The visit also included one immunization, a TB test, and, because they can't necessarily trust that all of her vaccinations were done in China, they had to draw blood to assess her immunizations. They had to draw blood for a few other things too... and in the end they needed 13 viles of blood from our poor sweet girl. The sweet nurses who were there to draw her blood are THE best at what they do... but our baby girl is just little, and so are her veins. It took three different attempts before they were finally able to find a vein that would give the amount of blood that they needed. It was pretty horrible. :( But we survived, and in the end I'm happy we just got the whole thing over with in one long day.

6 1/2 hours later, we were out of there! Whew!

Lots of orders for blood. At this point the nurse had run out to get more viles.

Happy to be home after a LONG day!

Understanding Lainey's Life Before Us...

In the 2 1/2 weeks since we have had Lainey, it has been so amazing to see the quick progress she has made. We know that a huge reason why she has done so well is because of the care she received in her orphanage. We were so thankful, before we could bring Lainey home, to learn that she was okay and being well cared for. In the last six months we've seen a lot of babies come home from very very tragic situations.

We've seen 2 year olds so neglected and malnourished that they were still in newborn diapers, and children who spent (and the children who still remain to this day are still spending) 22 hours out of every day in their cribs... for years and years on end. It's really sickening, to be honest. And it's a reality for thousands (if not millions) of innocent children around the world this very minute.

But our Lainey was fed, and she was given a chance to play and grow. We will forever be grateful for this. Still, she came from an orphanage... with way more babies than caregivers. And so, it just wasn't possible for her to have a lot of one-on-one attention, to be rocked to sleep, have someone hold her bottle for her, etc. Just too many babies, and we can't fault the orphanage for this.

We also know that her world was very, very small. Although the overall compound of her orphanage was large, the younger children like Lainey spent all of their time in two rooms. One was a playroom with some mats and toys, and the other was a room full of 30 cribs for all of the little ones. Off the crib room there was a door that went to a small outside area with some play equipment on solid ground, and on warm days this was the third space Lainey was in for her entire life before us.

Lainey in her crib, two weeks before we came to get her.

Anything beyond this small world has now been completely new to Lainey. She never saw carpet or grass, never played with stuffed animals (because they carry germs easier... though she did have one hanging in her crib), had never seen a dog or cat, never been constrained in a car seat or stroller, and possibly had only seen a man maybe once or twice ever. And of course there is so so much more she has never experienced before she was plucked her from this small world and everything changed.

It took her four days to emerge from the trauma of that (which is a beautifully short time), and we are still seeing day by day her adventurous spirit blossom. She is so incredibly brave and amazing.

Just days after we came home... The fear of grass has disappeared, and she wants to play! She wants to swing HIGH (only Daddy does it just right), slide down the big slide alone, and today... jump on a trampoline! She fell over and over, but instead of crying, she laughed. This is a child who would barely lift a finger to pop a bubble two weeks ago... who didn't want to be out of my sight, crawl or walk for four days.

These aren't just any other photos of a child paying, laughing, and eating watermelon like a boss... these moments are a miracle.

God is so good! He is the reason for all of this. He set this all in motion to right the wrongs done to her... through us... so we could find each other and she could have a chance to know a family and life lived to the fullest. So many more children wait... here and around the world. Is God calling you to be totally blessed in this way? :)

(or, if He's not... perhaps you might consider supporting an organization that is doing amazing things to improve the lives of orphans just like Lainey - in her very orphanage... for the children in the crib to her left and right... Red Thread Charities changed our baby girl's life! http://www.redthreadcharities.org).

My Littles

Baby Steps

Everyday Lainey is doing a little better! Thanks to the new playset (in particular, the SLIDE), she has now decided to be a brave girl and walk on the grass! YEA! I was wondering how this summer might go if she decided to maintain her fear of it.

The dog is taking a little more time, but she's making HUGE progress with her also. She'll come a little closer if Zoe is on the other side of our sliding door, and she doesn't shake violently or cry anymore when she sees her or is in the same room. She still doesn't want it actually anywhere close to her, but it's awesome how much better she's doing.

Baby girl is having a ROUGH time with the jet lag, and is teething hard. Twice now she has woken up with a fever from the teeth, and when that happens she is a very unhappy baby with almost no appetite, and not easily soothed. And the fatigue isn't helping much. She's staying up for most of the day, which is great, but also is up a lot in the night. Last night she went to bed at 8, then woke up for ibuprofen at 10:45, then she was up with us again from 2am - 4:45am (party in Lainey's room!), and then she was up for the day at 7:30. And with that, I would like to share with you a personal letter I wrote today.

To the person who invented coffee:

I love you. 

Your bff,
Lainey's Mommy

Our time in this zombie-like state is peppered with amazing, perfect moments where the kids are all playing together well, or when Canaan says things to me like, "Hey Mommy?" "Yes, Canaan?" "Thank you for bringing my baby sister home."

Life is good. :)

Ignore the rice on her chin (that she spit out when she decided all of a sudden that she doesn't like rice).

Fears and zzzzzzz..... what was I saying?

On the flight from Hong Kong to Chicago, there was a slender Asian girl who was possibly two inches taller than BJ. We're starting to wonder how tall our baby girl will be! I added her height to our growth chart at 3:30am last night (because, you know... jet lag). At 16 months, she is TWO inches taller than the boys were at the same age! I double checked because I couldn't believe that's right. She's just a very tall girl! :)

Things we're working on... forgive the bulleted list. Jet lag is seriously a killer! I think I could be doing good, but baby girl isn't yet... so Momma isn't yet. She wants to be close to me at night, and so for now I'll oblige. Nothing like cuddling my sweet girl (when she's actually asleep), and even though I'm beyond tired, the moments are so precious. :)

So, as I was saying, thing's we're working on:

• Getting Ezra adjusted to sharing his Momma, being gentle, and getting his crazy butt to CALM DOWN. He's a little wild for her (okay, all of us) at times! But man or man his hugs and kisses are THE best! And I love the way he calls her 'baby tister' in the sweetest little voice! :)
• Getting Lainey adjusted to the idea of grass. She's clearly never seen it or walked on it before, and she's not sure what to think. She has no desire to let her feet near it (and really I can't blame her... our "grass" is made up of 50% weeds). Canaan kept bringing her single blades of grass to inspect yesterday. He's such a sweetheart and so thoughtful of her needs. :) So proud of him!
• Figuring out what to feel baby girl, since her diet was very limited in China most of the things we give her are new to her. We're still giving her a very widened bottle (I doubled the opening of a size 4 nipple and the orphanage workers said to make it even larger) and warming the Chinese formula (the Chinese love HOT beverages, bottles included) she was on in the orphanage. It's comforting to her to have this consistent.
• The hardest of all at the moment is the dreaded... D.O.G.  She is TERRIFIED of her. Our large Zoe a total sweetheart, but Lainey doesn't know that yet. Just one look at her (even through glass), and she's literally shaking in fear. Guessing she's never seen a dog before either, and this one's at her eye level, so her fear is understandable. What is this horrifying beast?!

Almost like having twins!

Figuring it all out!

Num Num Num

Baby bottle cut open wide, like how she had it in the orphanage...

Flying the $1 dragon kite we got in China!

Baby girl MUCH happier on a blanket and farther away from the grass.

Happy in Momma's lap